What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

Why do people immediately disregard subjects such as flat earth, without opening their minds/taking time to research?

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

What do you mean son?

Do you know what she said mum?

Why do I keep waking up at 4 AM?

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

What does K mean in Vietnamese?

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

How do I write a character’s physical description without it feeling unnatural and clunky? I’m able to describe their hair and body relatively easily because my writing puts emphasis on small movements and fidgeting, but I can’t describe faces.

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

What! how could you do that?

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

I'm pretty sure that my dog is transgender, how would I go about transitioning it?

True - how I loved my mum!